Saturday, May 08, 2010

I should make a graph

So of course it's another blog about relationships. I've been through alot of them it seems. Loki, Lacey, Jami, Melinda, Natalie, Jenae, and now Kelci makes 7. Some people would say that is alot and I can't really say that it's not. Nobody can say that I haven't had enough experience I guess. I love girls and I have fun in my relationships, I only really had one relationship that ended up pretty badly but other than that they have all been good.

Another break up just seems to be the norm for me, but I've gotten use to it. I'm not horribly depressed, sure I am a little, but obviously past experience tells me there's more fish in the sea. I know nobody reads these things except maybe like one or two, Kelci included. If your reading this, I had fun and I'm not angry and I'm a little bit depressed but I'll keep on going. It always seems like I'm the starter guy. I'm the first boyfriend, the first kiss, the first something, then we go our seperate ways. The way I see it, I just hope all my previous girlfriends can at least take something from our time together. Learn to love, learn to not be afraid and follow your heart as cheesy as it sounds.

What Kelci did was admirable, she didn't want to hurt me but it was the right thing to do given the situation. I would feel terrible if I knew that she was staying in the relationship just because she didn't want to hurt my feelings. What ever the reason is she decided to end it, maybe she really did just think we'd be better as friends or maybe it was something more, she at least did it without dragging it out to long. Never be afraid to tell people how you truly feel. I did care for her, I thought we would have lasted longer, but that's life. I'm not happy we broke up but I know how to deal with break ups and that's just knowing that life goes on. I can just hope that she is dealing with it well.

My relationships seem to have been generally trending downward in length latelly.
Loki: 2 years
Lacey: 9 months
Jami: 9 months
Melinda: 1 month
Natalie: about 6 months
Jenae: 2 days (As official boyfriend/girlfriend, not just "friends that cuddle")
Kelci: 6 days

but hey, maybe Kelci is the start of my upward slope back to longer relationships. I know there's someone out there for me. I'm a nice guy, I'm a romantic guy (I may not show it, especially in early stages of relationships but I am) I'm a supportive person and overall likeable, and of course optimistic.